Fuck Chegg

The past few weeks we all have spent obsessing about a stupid irrelevant online battle of the bands competition that has ambiguous rules and frankly has its head up its ass. I have lost multiple nights of sleep to the LaIR trying to get our play count up to secure a spot in their worthless competition. I knew when I started having dreams of being a rock star that the rock music industry is a cesspool of immorality filled with people who really think they know shit about music, who hold the keys to people's careers, and who don't know the circle of 5ths from a goddamn frisbee.

The mission of this stupid competition consumed all of us for no reason, such to the point that I finally understood what all those rappers were talking about when they said they were "on their grind." For the first time in my life, I identified first and foremost as a rock musician, which is liberating. Everyone asks me what am I going to do when I graduate. The people I trust, I tell them "be a rock star," and that's exactly what's going to happen. So you know what Chegg, it's fine. You want to get super-technical about rules in a college music competition so you can reward a band who's members don't fucking go to college? That's your thing. When we're on the main stage of Bonnaroo, we'll call you up and laugh at your grandiloquent promises of "access to industry insiders" and your philanthropic bounty of Logic Pro.

You don't know what you've done Chegg. The last thing I need is an actual target for my rocking out, and the textbook industry is one of the most evil businesses in this country anyway. I know everyone wants their artists to be humble and unassuming but those people don't have to will their career into existence when the odds are always against you. Fuck the haters. Rock out till the end of time. To all the fans, the fact that you exist makes it all worthwhile. We got shit this weekend. Come see it.

Peace.